Dangers of Casual E-Mailing
An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.
When he reached his hotel in Florida, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter on the address and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a loud scream, and fell to the floor in a faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room, and saw this note on the screen: DEAREST WIFE: JUST GOT CHECKED IN. EVERYTHING IS PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW. P.S. SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE... |
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Yesterday for IT People
Yesterday,
All those backups seemed a waste of pay. Now my database has gone away. Oh I believe in yesterday. Suddenly, There's not half the files there used to be, And there's a milestone hanging over me The system crashed so suddenly. I pushed something wrong What it was I could not say. Now all my data's gone and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay. Yesterday, The need for back-ups seemed so far away. I knew my data was all here to stay, Now I believe in yesterday. |
One Liner
Did you hear about the guy who went to the dentist to get new dentures? His insurance was denied and he only had a dollar on him... so he wound up with buck teeth.
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Pythagoras Was A Native American
On the banks of a river sat three indian women, sitting on three different animal skins. On a deer skin was a woman with her son, and the son weighed 140 pounds. On a buffalo skin was another woman, and her son who weighed 160 pounds. And on a hippopotamus skin sat an immense indian woman, who weighed 300 pounds herself.
A native american mathemetician saw this and noted that the squaw on the hippopotamus was equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides. |
Late Night Funny #1
Tonight, I uncover secret data in your Facebook profile.Turns out Karen 'liking' your photo means she wants to get back together with you!
Stephen Colbert |
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Late Night Funny #2
You know what I liked best about the election of the new Pope? Just the fact that we don’t have to see any more of those negative Pope campaign ads.
Jay Leno |
Late Night Funny #3
Top Ten Questions On The Dog IQ Test
10. Did you eat the dishtowel? 9. If a car is moving at 30 mph and you chase it at 15 mph, how soon will you catch it? 8. Sit 7. What is it, boy, trouble at the mill? 6. Kibbles, bits, or none of the above? 5. Paw? 4. Conjugate "woof" 3. Who's a good doggie? 2. Summarize the advantage of licking yourself 1. Can you parallel park a car? (video of dog driving a car) David Letterman |
Late Night Funny #4
They had a panel discussion at CPAC called ‘Are You Sick and Tired of Being Called a Racist When You Know You’re Not One?’ Let me save you guys a lot of money. If you get called a racist often enough to be sick and tired of it, you might be a redneck.
Bill Maher |
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