Ανέκδοτα, 28/2/2012

Jokes by ArcaMax, sponsored today by:

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Free Drinks The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, "What'll you have?" The guy answers, "A scotch, please." The bartender hands him the drink, and says "That'll be five dollars," to which the guy replies, "What are you talking about? I don't owe you anything for this." A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then says to the bartender, "You know, he's got you there. In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration." The bartender was not impressed, but says to the guy, "Okay, you beat me for a drink. But don't ever let me catch you in here again." The next day, same guy walks into the bar. Bartender says, "What the heck are you doing in here? I can't believe you've got the audacity to come back!" The guy says, "What are you talking about? I've never been in this place in my life!" The bartender replies, "I'm very sorry, but this is uncanny. You must have a double." To which the guy replies, "Thank you. Make it a scotch." Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

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Simple Operation A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation. A nurse stopped him and asked, "What's the matter?" He said, "I heard the nurse say, 'It's a very simple operation, don't worry, I'm sure it will be all right.'" "She was just trying to comfort you, what's so frightening about that?" "She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor!" Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

Kidneys and Livers Two old men were arguing the merits of their doctors. The first one said, "I don't trust your fancy doctor. He treated old Jake Waxman for a kidney ailment for nearly a year, and then Jake died of a liver ailment." "So what makes you think your doctor is any better?" asked his friend. "Because when my doctor treats you for a kidney ailment, you can be sure you'll die of a kidney ailment." Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

Funny Ads These are advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country (or so we are led to believe) - Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in. - The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities. - Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast. - Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else. - Stock up and save. Limit: one. - We build bodies that last a lifetime. - For Rent: 6-room hated apartment. - Man, honest. Will take anything.