| Jokes by ArcaMax, sponsored today by: |
Doctor's lifesaving health quiz reveals the truth about hypertension you aren't hearing from your M.D.It's shocking... but one in three adults in the U.S. has high blood pressure. That's a whopping 77.5 Million people! You might be one of them. And most people suffering with high blood pressure have no clue what's keeping it high and neither do their doctors. What if everything you thought you knew about high blood pressure were wrong? Test Your BP Knowledge Now!
|
|
From my auto mechanic:
"That part is much less expensive than I thought."
"I've never seen anyone maintain his car as well as you do."
"You could get that done more cheaply at the garage down the street."
"It was just a loose wire. No charge."
From my son's preschool teacher:
"Everyone misbehaved today except Michael."
"Michael traded his candy bar for carrot sticks."
"I wish we had 20 Michaels."
|
Sponsor
|
|
From a store clerk:
"The computerized cash register is down. I'll just add up your purchases with a pencil and paper."
"I'll take a break after I finish waiting on these customers."
"We're sorry we sold you defective merchandise. We'll pick it up at your home and bring you a new one or give you a complete refund, whichever you prefer."
From my doctor:
"Of course I'll come by your house to check on you."
"Give me a call at home over the weekend if you're not feeling better."
"Sure, come on by this afternoon, we'll work you in."
"I'll call ahead and let them know the most you will pay for that test."
"Here, take these samples."
"Don't worry about it, there's no charge for that."
"I recommend you get a second opinion."
|
|
From a contractor:
"Whoever worked on this before sure knew what he was doing."
"I think I came in a little high on that estimate."
From my dentist:
"I think you're flossing too much."
"I won't ask you any questions until I take the pick out of your mouth."
From a restaurant server:
"I think it's presumptuous for a waiter to volunteer his name, but since you ask, it's Tim."
"I was slow and inattentive. I cannot accept any tip."
|
|
I was helping a buddy of mine, who was an orthopedic surgeon, move to his new office, and using my car to help transport some of his office equipment.
I had decided to position his somewhat fragile display skeleton strapped into the back seat of my car, his bony arm across the back of my seat...
At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me became quite obvious. I looked across and explained, "I'm delivering him to a doctor's office."
The other driver leaned out of his window. and commented, "I hate to tell you, but I looks like you may be a bit too late!"
|
Social Security column and more from ArcaMax Senior Living
|
Δεν υπάρχουν σχόλια:
Δημοσίευση σχολίου