ΑΝΕΚΔΟΤΑ 13/05/2013

Jokes by ArcaMax, sponsored today by:

How Carolyn Reversed Her Alzheimer's by Disobeying Her Doctor This all-natural protein melts away the brain-clogging mineral that triggers memory loss, dementia and Alzheimer's -- and cuts brain cell death in half! And yet this Nobel Prize-winning discovery is being ignored by 99% of doctors. Click here to read this FREE REPORT!

An American and an Irishman An American and an Irishman were enjoying a ride in the country when they came upon an unusual sight - an old gallows. The American thought he would have a joke on his Irish companion. "You see that, I reckon," said he to the Irishman, pointing to the gallows. "And now where would you be if the gallows had its due?" "Riding alone," coolly replied Paddy. Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

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Expensive Operation A woman was having a medical problem - her husband's snoring. So she called the doctor one morning and asked him if there was anything he could do to relieve her "suffering." "Well, there is one operation I can perform that will cure your husband, but it is really rather expensive. It will cost $1000 down and payments of $450 for 24 months, plus payments for extras." "My goodness!" the woman exclaimed, "it sounds like leasing a new sports car!" "Humm," the doctor murmured, "too obvious, huh?" Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

Blonde & Overhead Transparancy Q: What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency? A: She turned it over and used the other side. Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It

Two Lawyers Two lawyers were walking along, negotiating a case. "Look," said one to the other, "let's be honest with each other." "Okay, you first," replied the other. That was the end of the discussion.  ================================================================================== Jokes by ArcaMax, sponsored today by: How Carolyn Reversed Her Alzheimer's by Disobeying Her Doctor This all-natural protein melts away the brain-clogging mineral that triggers memory loss, dementia and Alzheimer's -- and cuts brain cell death in half! And yet this Nobel Prize-winning discovery is being ignored by 99% of doctors. Click here to read this FREE REPORT! Editor's Note: You receive Late Night Jokes because you are subscribed to the Jokes ezine. This PM edition is sent Monday through Friday. Click here to stop receiving the evening edition. Late Night Funny #1 A poll taken this week said that 44 percent of Republicans believe that armed rebellion may be necessary in the next few years to protect their liberties. You know what, I wish these screw-ups would start their armed rebellion. I just want to see the look on their face when they walk out of the Waffle Hut and get smoked by a drone. Bill Maher Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It Sponsor Enter to win the keys to a brand new Lexus(R)GS! Just take a short survey, and you'll be automatically entered to win. Don't want a new car? Then take the $50,000 cash instead. Enter here Late Night Funny #2 Senator Tom Coburn has introduced a new gun background check plan that would allow people to perform self-background checks before buying a gun. The way the plan works is, it doesn’t. Seth Meyers Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It Late Night Funny #3 Unemployment is at the lowest rate in four years and the stock market hit 15,000 for the first time, or as FOX News put it ‘Gosh darn Obama. Always undoing George Bush’s greatest accomplishments.’ Bill Maher Print | Comment | Tweet It | Facebook It Late Night Funny #4 Yesterday President Obama warned Congress not to delay the immigration reform bill. You can tell he’s getting tough because if they keep delaying the bill, he says he might even warn them again. Jimmy Fallon